So, we are far closer in agreement than I thought. But I will still argue that if the man concerned has a HISTORY of abuse and thus the risk of abuse is unusually high, then he is not a fit parent and the courts will not decide that.

In the vast majority of circumstances, she should absolutely talk to him. Apart from anything else, she DOES need his consent to get a paternity test done and then everyone involved can hopefully talk it out like adults.

I’m just very hard line on protecting kids from abusers because unfortunately I’ve met/encountered one too many (and no, not all of them men).