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When People Mock Grief
Some years ago, my horseback riding trainer at the time had me regularly riding a horse named Charlie. Charlie was not a horse many people liked; he was stubborn and grouchy and often had to be coaxed into performing. He didn’t like anyone in his stall.
Two weeks before the barn show Charlie, who was only 8 years old, got abruptly sick and died.
Thankfully, nobody in my life mocked me for grieving Charlie. Honestly, there were days I wanted to send that horse to the glue factory. But I’m still grieving for Charlie.
Sadly, too many people will mock others for grieving, if they don’t think the thing they are grieving is worth it. Whether it’s a pet, a canceled vacation or event or, worst of all, an unborn child, people will try to “help” by telling you “It’s only…”
Charlie was only a horse. He was also in a weird sense my friend.
When People Add to the Mourner’s Suffering
I lost a friend early this year. No, it was not COVID-19 (because we have to say that right now).
Don was a good man, he was also a happily married man. We held a virtual memorial for him which was organized, loosely, by his widower, Thomas.
At this memorial, somebody said “I know Don was your good friend.”