You just need to know what to order.

Choose:

Fish and chips, preferably from a takeout-only hole in the wall. They aren't allowed to wrap it in newspaper any more, but some stores use fake newspaper. Another alternative is classic English fish cakes. The vinegar is an important part.

Full English breakfast.

Bangers and mash, often with baked beans. This is actually a British "quick school night supper" for the kids but is also served as "pub grub." You may see upmarket versions with higher quality "bangers." (Bangers are sausages and mash in this context is mashed potatoes).

IF you can find it, roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. Yorkshire pudding is a side from before the New World was discovered and is a kind of starchy dumpling served instead of potatoes.

Savory pies! British people make fantastic savory pies. The classics are steak and ale or steak and kidney OR chicken and mushroom. A lot of pubs have gotten very inventive, though.

Pasties. A great hand held lunch...and you can often get them for very, very low prices in small working towns.

Scotch eggs. These are hard boiled eggs wrapped in processed pork, breaded, cooked and then chilled. Picnic food.

Treacle pud and toffee pud. With custard. The custard in this instance is a thin sauce. Treacle is light molasses. Spotted dick is a variant that involves raisins (the spots) and a name that might make the more juvenile titter.

Curry houses. There are also Indian restaurants. Both are good, but there *are* Indian restaurants in the U.S. I've only ever found one curry house on this continent. How do you know? The menu is 95% different types of curry, all available with all proteins, the dining room doesn't have any frills and it's half the price. Don't get the vindaloo unless you're the kind of person who inhales jerk chicken. If you are, get the vindaloo. Korma is typically the least spicy offering. Or ask your waiter, they will steer you through the landmine that can be a curry house menu...

Avoid:

Meat and two veg or "Sunday roast." The veg will be boiled until all texture is lost and the meat will likely be dry. It's supposed to be like that. Anything that is roast meat served with vegetables is likely to suck.

Gammon, unless you are feeling adventurous. Note: I love gammon. It's one of the things I HAVE to get when I go back. I adore gammon. It is what is politely referred to as an "acquired taste." It's similar to what Americans call country ham. Extraordinarily salty. As in that's your week's supply of sodium right there. There is a war as to whether it should be served with a fried egg or pineapple. I have had it served with both. If you are feeling adventurous, try it! If you are not...

Black pudding. This is not a dessert. It's blood sausage. You may *like* blood sausage, in which case you can find some really good blood sausage, although the Estonians may be better. But it can really catch you out if you don't know what it is.

Be wary of ice cream too. A lot of the time it's crappy vanilla soft serve that might have had artificial vanilla waved in its general direction. Go for Italian ice or similar if you can find it. (I like the crappy vanilla soft serve but that's because it's a nostalgia thing).